Uh... Uhm... I'm-... *sweat-stained pages*
I'm a sentient beetle from a distant jungle island! My... name is Chakarilzorth, The Tepidly, of Clan Korbvt.
Most just call me 'Cheeky', though.
And what? Can't a sapient and literate beetle read some books on foreign nations?
[sigh] Every pony I interact with is always so ethnocentric. Haven't any of you ever been outside of Equestria before? No, the "Crystal Empire" doesn't count.
As for fruitloops... uhh... You know, what? Let's skip that little bet this time. You probably don't want one, cheap things really just cut the roof of your mouth in the end anyhow.
I also have a tongue, if you're wondering.